I feel like the more I train the weaker I get

Orientation was very expectedly a waste of time but surprisingly.. Good too :-) I think the OICs did a really good job and the class first I/Cs as well. I feel bad cos I think I didn't really show great attitude or anything..... I rmb quite a few times I accidentally let slip something I don't like/am not satisfied with about the events and all to get some awkward stares.. I know better than to blurt it all out like that but I've lost the passion for being enthusiastic out of nowhere and I secretly hope they can improve on it in future... Sigh am a totally horrible PSL I'm just trying to cover for myself here :/ it's just..... I've learn how to step out of my comfort zone and all to approach people but if I had a choice I'd rather not I'm really a scaredy cat secretly ya >< anw I think the overload of manpower led to some welcome (and inevitable) lepaking heheheh. #welfaretableforever hahaha. I do regret not taking some pictures.. But good thing our last event was memorable :->

I haven't felt like "I want to get close to you" in a long time. I think it's quite a.. Rare but cool feeling. Such friendships are usually stronger than normal but they're others which are undoubtedly better. Still it's fascinating ;)