When you're in a room full of people on the phone you listen to the laughs overlapping the words melting together the awkward pauses standing out louder than the conversation. It's a nice feeling just sitting there watching observing absorbing but you want to speak eventually god knows why and you realise nobody heard you anymore you call out tap their shoulders kick their chairs. Still they are oblivious. You are indignant at first. You don't understand why they don't respond to you - why? You try but it embarrasses you. This utter disregard; it humiliates you. So you stop. It's not important, you think. I don't have anything good to say anyway, they probably expected it so it's okay.

It is this oblivion that has you suffocated - shallow breaths, heaving chest - and nauseous. This suppression forces your words back there, back to where they came from back to nothingness, forces you to unthink your thoughts unweave your story unwind your top.

Nothing said, nothing lost; or is it?