Does it ever occur to you how people
choose the most outstanding vivid attractive images to write about? It feels like there is a certain form as to what is considered the 'most correct form'. I do that too, unfortunately. Don't snigger. It's such a bad habit. I realized my vocab is really pathetic after doing those English compres and summaries ugh and I really can't write properly anymore I think it's horrible horrible I can only rant and ramble on and on like this..... I am truly a disgrace to society sigh

Thinking about it this few days and I realise I am really not 善长 at anything. No I am not feeling sorry for myself (ok maybe just a bit) but it's just.. I feel like maybe I should give up on things I am incompetent at and maybe leave some more time for things I am (hopefully) less incompetent at.. it's just like having 9 subjects and 9 F9s instead of 11 subjects and 11 F9s hahaha. Why can't I be good in something so tired already. Btw oral was.... Bleh. Stumbled over the whole of the last paragraph and even added in my own words I question my sanity somedays. And for the spoken interaction I think there was not enough time so I didn't manage to link most of my parts back to the question and the grizzly bear probably thinks I'm an incoherent idiot now. Score one for jadey.

Want nothing more than to weep for a little while now but I have maths to do and waterworks don't exactly hydrate your eyes if you know what I'm saying. Everyday I just want to sleep sigh life is really fine now but I just cannot produce any results cos I'm too bloody occupied with wasting time and failing to achieve anything ever. Tomorrow's another test I'm bound to fail again. I don't know I don't know I really hate the feelings evoked from this entire experience. But I guess it's cos I'm not trying hard enough? Anything is easier than admitting I am completely rubbish.

I am trying to get myself to write a piece for a competition but I really can't pen down my thoughts. I can't write in 'continuous prose form' anymore I focus on the emotions too much that I just break down the story into fragmented crap I guess. Maybe the only thing I'm not pathetic at is failing me too? I wish it was as simple as 'not being able to work under pressure' it's probably 'not being able to work regardless of pressure' hence I am probably just a malfunctioning toy.

I really can't do anything.